Rabbits Full of Magic

Being 6 hours in the future for nearly 2 weeks and then coming back, it takes some time to get used to, because when it's 9pm my body thinks it's really 3am. Also my brain thinks I'm asleep most of the time these days so that isn't helping things too much. The best thing for me right now is to watch beautiful movies, eyes drifting in and out of focus, plot more or less inconsequential to the experience. My little machine has been busily downloading the >mystical films of Jordan Belson which one may think to be appropriate at this juncture. Nevertheless I prefer to comprehend a spiritual vision under the full capacity of my own mind-soul and at the moment my physical and ethereal components are out of whack and slow to realignment. Kubrick's gorgeous Barry Lyndon will do just fine for the moment; beautiful people in beautiful places going through absolute hell like stately Victorian robots.


Arriving back home everything feels so alien to me. To begin with Atlanta had undergone an historical torrential rain the entire period I was gone and it was all anyone talked about when I got back. During my first day back the rain stopped and all day today it's been bright and sunny - yet the rain talk continues. People all around me are talking about a world that is completely alien to me; and not even a conceptual world but actual, physical, concrete, material reality. It's another drop in the bucket of my discontentment.

The feeling of jet lag is very real, and very strange. It is the same kind of feeling as being high, or having a hangover that doesn't involve a pounding headache or nausea. There is a lightness to the head, a dreamy experience of reality, and a constant heaviness of the eyelids. On Saturday night I stayed awake all night, singing karaoke and dancing with friends at a club called Deep in Malmo, and then at 5am I took a taxi to central station, then a train to Copenhagen, then a plane to Stockholm, had my luggage emptied out by customs and had to re-pack, then a 9 hour flight to Philadelphia, then a 4 hour layover, then a flight to Atlanta, where Pedro was a good sport and picked me up and brought me to Spooks practice. One of the Spooks had a new song that they learned and played on Monday night opening for The Horrors, who were really nice guys from London. Even if jet lag wasn't an issue I would still be completely exhausted from being awake and travelling for 2 straight days. Frankly I was amazed that I made it through all of that in any shape, dazed or not.


My spirits have yet to fail me due to the rediscovery of old friends and the incredible daily beauty of my trip to Sweden, which was one blossoming experience of wonder after another, often making it hard to sleep from the unexpected joy I had found. Today I was let go from my job and due to an unfortunate incident taking place shortly before my departure, found myself sans automobile as well. I realized as I was handed my termination papers that I would also lose the only health insurance coverage I had ever managed to maintain on my own. My boss profusely apologized about the situation and I think my calm was almost disturbing in the fact of such bad news but there's that line that Lou Reed sings "What comes is better than what came before" and I completely and wholeheartedly believe in that. Now, thoughts of moving to Sweden are seeming less and less like daydreams than my actual earthly life.

Complete set of photos from my trip to Malmo, Sweden, and beyond, can be found here.